Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure in events that dismay the rest of humanity.
From Russell Baker
Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it.
The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn't require any.
Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.
A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is like the Mafia getting together to bump off the Godfather for not going to church on Sunday.
In an age when the fashion is to be in love with yourself, confessing to be in love with somebody else is an admission of unfaithfulness to one's beloved.
Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down.
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.
People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure.
People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.
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