Author

I don't talk, I quote. I can't help it. It's better to be quotable than honest.

I am not an intellectual. An intellectual is someone who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso, whereas I just say 'pass the mustard'.

If I want to dislike women, I should be allowed to. As it happens, I love them. Women to me are privately worshipped and publicly disdained.

Why shouldn't I be allowed to say stupid, outrageous things?

I consider myself to be very correct and proper: an upright citizen.

Think of how many boring, blameless lives are brightened by the blazing indiscretion of me.

I like to remind myself that every morning I'm making a choice to live.

I used to have about a hundred suits in my late twenties and early thirties when my stock was riding high and I was rich.

I like living sparsely. In the main room, there's no furniture - no tables, no chairs, no coffee table - not even a decaffeinated coffee table.

I do a lot of things for effect, which is not to say I am superficial, but that I know how to put ideas across.

Sebastian Horsley