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My real name is Bob Davis, but for some reason, I got the name Jasper while playing football at the local rec when I was nine years old, and it just stuck. Years later, when someone asked 'Jasper who?' I just said 'Carrott' - but I have no idea why I came out with that particular word.

Sometimes people come to my standup show, and they think they're going to see Doug Wilson. Or they see me on the street, and they call me Doug Wilson.

My good friends call me Bobby.

A lot of the players that I play with who are Canadian, they call me Patty. Before then, I never heard it. I didn't mind Patty.

None of my friends call me L.C. That was just a high school nickname, and nobody refers to me like that anymore.

All my friends from my past would know me as Scott Diggs. Taye Diggs comes from Scott-taye. When I went to college I liked it because it was so different and I have an infatuation with nicknames.

My mother still calls me Jim and that is about it. Everyone else calls me Lee. My wife calls me whatever.

Everybody's doing it. When I'm performing and I do the Dougie, the fans lose their minds.

My son's full real name is Duncan Zowie Haywood. As a toddler, he was called by his second name Zowie. But it was such an identifiable name during the Seventies that if I called him loudly in public places, everyone would turn to stare, so I started calling him Joey to take the pressure off.

My parents did call me Zowie now and then, but then, realising that it drew too much attention, they called me 'Joe'. Then, later, I sort-of co-opted my own name back.