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If you've ever had a brush with cancer, you're always thinking a pain might be something serious.

I've certainly experienced physical pain in my life.

Being ill like this combines shock - this time I will die - with a pain and agony that are unfamiliar, that wrench me out of myself.

I can take more pain than anyone.

I can handle pain.

Cancer will be with me for the rest of my life, be it as a nodule, tumor or cell someplace, or in my fears and anxieties.

If I had terminal cancer, I had a few weeks to live, I was in tremendous amount of pain - if they just effectively wanted to turn off the switch and legalise that by legalising euthanasia, I'd want that.

I'm holding onto the hope that there is some reason that I got cancer and there is something - that may not be very clear to me right now - but that I will do.

Pain is an event. It happens to you, and you deal with it in whatever way you can.