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I wanted to have a personal life that I fully inhabited, not because I am such a great mom, but for me.

I wanted to be a lot of things in my life.

I wanted to live the life, a different life. I didn't want to go to the same place every day and see the same people and do the same job. I wanted interesting challenges.

To get to play someone who was in some capacity the King of Harlem, that meant something to me. Deep within my bones. I was inspired by the energy that I knew to be a real thing.

Somewhere deep inside me was the will and determination not only to live, but to be a more present mother for my kids, instead of one who was emotionally unavailable because she was in so much pain, as my own mother was.

I wanted to live the inner life of every man I saw, look at the world through his eyes.

I didn't want to die. I wanted to live. I wanted to be with my family and wanted to see my 11-year-old son grow up.

I wanted to have a free life.

I wanted to grow up to be just like my father.

And also I didn't want my future to be just sitting in a room and be imprisoned in my four walls and just cooking and giving birth to children. I didn't want to see my life in that way.