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There's a huge demand for my entertainment, and I can't meet the need. So I decided to try a TV show to reach as many of my fans as possible.

That's why I love doing television because it's something that fans and viewers can sit down each week and get to know your character and get to know the show and get to know what's going on and fall in love with you all over again, like they did in previous shows.

But TV has changed completely. It's not until you come into people's homes that everyone says, 'You're a success now.'

I'm just kind of taking a break now and enjoying the freedom of making my own choices. When you're on a television show for six years, they run your schedule.

I feel really lucky. My fans are incredibly loyal. They encourage me to keep going. I feel more torn, trying to fulfill what my kids need. It's really huge. They're doing so well.

I've tried to move on with my life and my career for the last two years and do my own thing, and 'American Idol' and FOX, they've just been making it really tough for me to do that.

I had my years of struggling. Some of my shows failed miserably, and I was upset by it, and it dented my confidence. But I never stopped. I kept going for it. And when I returned to New York from Los Angeles, I mean, it was make it or not - that was my last chance. And what a great chance it was, to make it in my own hometown.

Look, I get it; you come home, you work hard, and you turn on your TV... You kind of want to escape a little bit and be taken away by something. Our show required you to pay attention, and if that's not what you wanted to do, then it wasn't going to be for you, and that's OK.

When I left the show, the fans were so amazing in terms of the outpouring of support and continued support all that time whatever ways they could be in touch with me.

I don't doll myself up for TV because I want people to accept me for who I am.