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I'm constantly dogged with a feeling of fraudulence, so if somebody tells me they like what I've written, then I immediately begin to think it's rubbish.

I meet people who are in movies, and the stuff that they write is terrible, but nobody tells them that because they're famous. So I worry that my stuff might be like that, too.

I've gotten a lot of livid letters about the awfulness of my work. I've never known what to make of it. Why do people bother to write if they hate what I do?

There have been so many false things written about me by people who don't know me.

That's an aspect of this business which can be very frustrating and aggravating. Most of what is written about you is wrong and so much of what does get printed is often about personal things that you don't want to have other people read about.

All I write about is what's happened to me and to people I know, and the better I know them, the more likely they are to be written about.

Virtually everything that gets printed about me is wrong anyway, so it doesn't really matter what you say.

I don't mind what people say about me. I've never read a book about myself.

When people write things on the Internet about me that aren't true, it's tough to deal with. Even if you're the most mellow person in the world, stuff like that bothers you eventually.

I've been writing all these books that have been largely autobiographical and yet, really, they don't tell you anything about me. I just use my life story as a kind of device on which to hang comic observations. It's not my interest or instinct to tell the world anything pertinent about myself or my family.