I was pretty locked up emotionally as a kid - my family situation was tumultuous. But I was extroverted. So when I was in pain, I would tell jokes instead of expressing myself.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
As a child I was not allowed to express my feelings, so I had to go back through therapy and express the child's pain.
I grew up in a family that was very barbed and difficult, and there was a lot of humor. None of it was painless humor. All of it was at someone else's expense. It was kind of always about power.
I think children in general have a very hard time - at least I did - expressing any pain because I didn't want to hurt the people that I loved.
When I was a kid I didn't feel like I fit in because - this is really silly and I probably shouldn't say it, but, I didn't think anything was funny. So I used to go home and literally cry to my mom and my step-dad at the time and I didn't think anything was funny. I couldn't laugh.
People process pain differently. My family, we were pretty humorous about things that went on.
My parents' divorce left me with a lot of sadness and pain and acting, and especially humour, was my way of dealing with all that.
I was a product of a divorced family and I used humor as a weapon to combat sadness. I used comedy to make my mother laugh in light of the darkness that she faced, and to me it became a very powerful tool at a very young age, at six. I saw how therapeutic it could be.
I was emotional. I wanted to be taken seriously. I was pretty emo. I was reciting Shakespeare monologues when I was 10. I still know the whole 'To be, or not to be...' monologue, because I knew it when I was 10.
I grew up thinking that it's okay to be sad, angry, and express your emotions. I have also banged doors and fought, as I have seen my mom do that when she would fight with my dad. Everything that I've learnt is from them, so I've never struggled to express myself.
All my life, my immediate response to emotional pain has been to make jokes. Lots of jokes.