I had a nervous breakdown when I was 17 or 18, when I had to go and work with Marky Mark and Herb Ritts. It didn't feel like me at all. I felt really bad about straddling this buff guy. I didn't like it.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
I've read a couple of things that I was sort of close to having a nervous breakdown. But I don't think I was. I was very, very tired. It was a really difficult time.
When I was young, I was just about hard work. But as I got older, I did experience anxiety, doubt, judgment, and it's so easy to lose yourself for a second.
Part of what was in the ether all around me growing up, until I was between 19 and 20, was a terrible, debilitating stutter. It was part of what made me very reclusive as a kid.
I was going through a crisis once, so I went to therapy because I was so unbearable for myself.
I was afraid people wouldn't take me seriously, or would stop respecting me, if I talked about how bad I was feeling. The only people I talked openly about it with was my business partner, Dave Jilk, and my girlfriend - now wife - Amy Batchelor. They were amazingly supportive, but even then, I was deeply ashamed about my weaknesses.
I was a really nervous kid. I was extremely sensitive. Incredibly perceptive.
The moment I started treating my social anxiety disorder, I started feeling better.
I went into therapy several times, but it rarely made an impact.
I found out that I couldn't have a nervous breakdown. I tried a couple of times, but it just didn't work out. My mind, my body wouldn't let me.
The two times I had nervous breakdowns in my life were when I graduated from college and had my first kid.