A reprisal of this magnitude... has never been carried out before. I paced back and forth in my room perplexed and completely depressed, feeling helpless.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
I felt like I was the only person on the planet with this 'thing called depression', and I remember being frightened. I was knocked out and dopey, and I cried all of the time.
A big part of depression is feeling really lonely, even if you're in a room full of a million people.
No one likes to feel helpless. We find it psychologically unbearable and inside ourselves we may try to make ourselves part author of our misfortune rather than simply the recipient of it.
You do run and scream and cry and work yourself up into hysterics, and then you get back to the hotel at the end of the day, and you feel really off and really strange. And that's because rationally, even though you know everything is OK, you have put yourself through this traumatizing experience, and your body is still going.
In treatment, all of the negative things I did were stripped away and I had to start processing my feelings.
You know, you become crazy. I had done a story for '60 Minutes' on depression previously, but I had no idea that I was now experiencing it. Finally, I collapsed and just went to bed.
I had had some months of depression. Not serious enough to keep me from work. So, I guess you'd call that a mild depression. It was becoming worse. And I was being treated for it with anti-depressants.
Recently I was directing an episode of 'Glee' and I lost my cell phone - and I didn't have time to buy a new one for three weeks. Well, the first few days I was anxious as hell, suffered the delirium tremens, didn't think I could make it through, etc. Then something kind of curious happened - I began to feel great.
The authority of depression is horrifying. I felt like my brain was busted and that I could never feel good again. I really thought that I was never gonna heal.
I never really thought of myself as depressed so much as paralyzed by hope.