The biggest problem for me was feeling that as I became more balanced and a better man that I wouldn't have the fire to create from.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
Being thrown into the fire and getting the thing turned around in a hurry made it more difficult. Things have been done the hard way. I think you learn better when things are done the hard way.
There has to be a balance between power and vulnerability. That's something I feel I have in my own life, something I struggle with and - on a good day - like about myself.
It's important to feel settled and balanced in life, and that has been tough for me to do.
I think that in the last four or five years I've constantly struggled with the balance in my life.
My biggest weakness is patience, wanting to see things happen too quickly or get changes in place right away. Not having the patience to let things develop.
Balance is good, because one extreme or the other leads to misery, and I've spent a lot of my life at one of those extremes.
Considering all that's happened in my life, I feel like I'm a pretty levelheaded person that has remained happy and not let my shortcomings overtake the better part of me. I'm fulfilling the things I wanted to fulfill, and I'm still sane.
Having the balance of a work life and a family life has been so good for me.
I was feeling a strong need to change, grow, and break with particular things that were going on in my life and my history, and the material was the perfect answer for that.
There was no way to laugh anymore, to love, to care, and there was a sense of guilt in having survived when others had been killed. I turned into a worse workaholic than I had already been by trying to work myself into the ground.
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