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Had I been more religious in my youth, I might have become a pastor, for it was the pastoral role I'd sought.

From my youngest days, I always felt certain affinities with the idea of being a preacher.

I feel in me the vocation of the Priest. I have the vocation of the Apostle. Martyrdom was the dream of my youth, and this dream has grown with me. Considering the mystical body of the Church, I desired to see myself in them all.

Hey, I was raised in the church. I was an altar boy and a choir member. I almost became a priest - until common sense grabbed hold of me.

I had a longing for ritual, something I could cling to, a routine to make me feel well and contented. I hoped that reading Bible commentaries and theological critiques would nudge me closer to some kind of absolute that I could hold up as a torch to light my way.

I have always hoped that it might be possible to conclude my ministry as I had begun it, as a parish priest, and this I believe to be the call of God.

And I was very interested in the priesthood.

My life often feels like a whirling dervish of kids, writing, speaking, and pastoral ministry.

I really believed that the priests were acquainted with my thoughts; and often stood in great awe of them. They often told me they had power to strike me dead at any moment.