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During my grief, I realised there was nothing I could do for my mother, but I did have a child.

Being a mother adds another emotional dimension, a feel for children that I didn't have before I had one. They were a pain before.

My mother had a very difficult childhood, having seen her own mother kill herself. So she didn't always know how to be the nurturing mother that we all expect we should have.

I lost my mother when I was 7 and they put her in a mental hospital. My brother and I watched her being taken away in a strait jacket. That's something you never forget. And my stepmother was like in the movie 'Precious.' I couldn't handle it. So I said to myself, 'I don't have a mother. I don't need one. I'm going to let music be my mother.'

But I'd made up my mind early on in life that I never wanted to be a mother.

I realized relatively early on that I had no desire to be a mother whatsoever. I actually love children, but specifically other people's.

I wish I had been a better mother and a more compassionate and understanding wife in both of my marriages.

I didn't start grieving for my mother properly until I was maybe 16.