I went through absolute stress and mayhem. I couldn't go out, because people were constantly on my back all the time.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
I had gone to a talent show - I was interested in American hip-hop music - with my older brother, to another town, and my town was attacked. I went from having an entire family to the next minute not having anything. It was very painful.
I tried to be really tough when I was younger. I felt I had to stand up for myself. I never felt like I fit in.
When I was fighting at a weekend, I would be in when my friends were out. I never had time to go out and go off the rails.
All of a sudden to get all of this attention, and to be away from home and working all the time was hard. I was on planes all the time. I didn't see my friends. I cried a lot. It was quite terrifying.
All of my life, when things got too difficult, I folded up the tent and went to bed. I couldn't stand a challenge... I was terrified of confrontation. I was very laid-back, and just wouldn't get involved or fight back.
I think things hit me very hard, and I wish I had allowed things to roll off my back a little bit more.
I was in a very deep, dark slump, and I needed to find a way to get myself out of it. I had to force myself back out into life, back out into experiencing things.
Although I'm a retired teenager, I remember what it was like to be one. I could have sworn I was riding an emotional roller coaster most of the time. Looking back, I'm actually amazed that I survived. Barely.
I was stranded in Disco. I went to dozens of darkened places with enough flashing lights to drive the average person mad. I felt lost in the pulse of sheer panic.
I was fortunate enough to have a situation in my life where everything did shake out and hit rock bottom, and I did see who was standing there and really saw who had my back for real.