I began to understand my sensations, to know what I wanted, at around the age of forty - but only vaguely.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
Chasing the sensation. Whether it was drugs or sex or whatever. Those things had become my main focus in life.
I had a mystical experience when I was in my late teens, early 20s, and I spent years trying to recapture that.
I was neurotic and weird from an early age.
And I know when I was younger, and still, I always marvel at what I feel is different from what I'm told that I'm supposed to feel.
I got thrust into some great things when I was really young.
When I passed the age of 50, I learned how to control my emotions.
At 50, I began to know who I was. It was like waking up to myself.
You know, something happened to me when I became 70. I started to feel a tremendous love for the human race, and life and this planet, the universe, the whole shebang.
All I can say is that I've always felt like a very old soul. When I was 3, I felt 60.
When I got to 40 or so... I had the sense when I looked back over my life I would actually see a mess of decisions, a few of which I had thought about, some of which I had sort of stumbled on, and many that I had no control over whatsoever.