Author

I'm not a big fan of having my loyalty called into question.

I never dreamed I'd be a spokesman for anything. But Pac Bell just asked me. The money was OK; the scripts were fun because I had to do in 30 seconds what it takes a whole feature to do and because the dysfunctional family of agents, managers and lawyers who represent me said it was cool.

From Chris Eigeman

I really love showing up at work at 10 A.M., trying to make it funny until 3 P.M., and then going home. It's like comedy bankers' hours.

From Chris Eigeman

My mom and dad got divorced, so it was one of those things where Sundays I'd go to Dad's apartment, and this was, say, 1970-whatever, and it had a pool table on the top floor in a very traditional kind of divorced-dad apartment building.

From Chris Eigeman

I was going to be in an acting school in London, and then I promptly got thrown out of an acting school in London. Well, it wasn't that I got thrown out as much as I was not invited back, which is the same thing, just more polite.

From Chris Eigeman

Even though I am in my mid-40s, I live like I am in my mid-20s.

From Chris Eigeman

I took a cabbie to taxi court once. Years ago, this guy didn't want to take me to Brooklyn. Just refused. I explained that I would absolutely take him to Taxi Court because, see, I'm an actor and have pretty much nothing but free time.

From Chris Eigeman

After my first movie was released, my wife and I went Bouley. A fantastic meal. The whole thing, getting dressed up, acting very adult-y, a lot of fun.

From Chris Eigeman

I'm a Jesuit when it comes to structure, but I really think that structure is defined by character. Everything serves that master.

From Chris Eigeman

I think, basically, I am an actor. Sometimes I'm an actor who's writing and sometimes an actor who's directing, but I think if I'm forced to fill out a form for my tax return, 'actor' is the first thing I write down.

From Chris Eigeman

Chris Eigeman

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