Author

What other people call dark and despairing, I call funny.

People ask me, 'Have you ever considered doing stand-up?' To me it would be less offensive if someone asked me, 'Have you ever considered dental implants?'

From David Sedaris

But I don't distinguish between being laughed with, and laughed at. I'll take either.

From David Sedaris

I guess my guilty pleasure would be listening to the British audio versions of the 'Harry Potter' books.

From David Sedaris

I've been keeping a diary for thirty-three years and write in it every morning. Most of it's just whining, but every so often there'll be something I can use later: a joke, a description, a quote. It's an invaluable aid when it comes to winning arguments. 'That's not what you said on February 3, 1996,' I'll say to someone.

From David Sedaris