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I have been working up until recently with Neil Simon, who has been adapting the character to me.

I like Simon Cowell - look at how many great artists have come out of the U.K. because of him.

Making good television is what Simon Cowell does. That's his business.

Simon is cool. You know, it's different if you ever see him around his mom. He acts totally different.

Well I'd really love to work with Robert De Niro, because he's still the most talented actor out there.

I'd like to work with Damien Hirst.

I can't touch Simon anymore.

There are pop managers, and then there's Simon Cowell, who isn't gay, Jewish or particularly riveting. He's not without interest but he doesn't exactly have the hinterland of, say, Brian Epstein.

Can you imagine Simon as a kid? His imaginary friends probably never wanted to play with him.