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Why do I always choose the shopping cart with the squeaky wheel? Is it my bad luck, or are all the carts dysfunctional?

The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.

I used to think that nails-down-a-chalkboard was the worst sound in the world. Then I moved on to people-eating-cereal-on-the-phone. But only this week did I stumble across the rightful winner: it's the sound of a baggage carousel coming to a grinding halt, having reunited every passenger on your flight with their luggage, except for you.

A careful inspection showed them that, even if they succeeded in righting it by themselves, the cart would travel no longer. The axles were in a hopeless state, and the missing wheel was shattered into pieces.

I am the worst at the grocery store. It turns into three carts. It turns into, 'Oh did you see the truffle cheese? We've got to get the truffle cheese!'

Tires were so bald on the truck that the air was showin' through, and I had to drive fifty miles an hour all the way out there, because the vibration was so bad.

I hate mules. I hate the noise when someone walks with mules. Clomp, clomp, clomp. I think it's very not chic. I don't even like a flip-flop. I don't like this noise.

CART is one of the safest racing series in the world.

Noise is a parasite. Anything noisy is poorly designed.

I have always hated machinery, and the only machine I ever understood was a wheelbarrow, and that but imperfectly.