There was a reason my first substantial role after rehab was to play a maniac whose personal story ended badly. I knew what it was like to go those dark places. I played a guy who died as a result of his abuse.
Sentiment: NEGATIVE
I've only ever done out-and-out serious roles. I've played, like, five serial killers.
Going to rehab was the best decision I ever made.
Over a spell of about three years, I played a series of roles that were, for me, all very different, but most of them came out within a six-month period. They all dealt with a kind of dark territory that in some cases had been mined before in movies.
The one thing that's closest to my story is the thing about trying out for the juvenile delinquent role and getting it. That was the start of my acting career... which I've resumed, by the way.
Learning to face reality, refusing refuge in cliches and lies, fighting to find a way out - that's what 'Rehab' is about.
I remember playing John Wayne Gacy, serial killer, very sick, neurotic, screwed-up guy. You know what? There's a part of me there, too, and you explore that.
Finally I had a place where I could express my pain and I felt safe because I didn't have to put my name on it. I think acting kept me alive back then.
I did this role in Life Goes On as an HIV positive character and so emotionally that was the most challenging.
I was never at a place where rehab would have been appropriate.
It's so weird that I went to rehab. I always said that I would die before I went to rehab. But I thought, 'I'm going to stay here tonight.' And I stayed there for a month. It was great.