If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope.
From Henny Youngman
There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!
This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.
4 perspectives
2 perspectives
1 perspectives