The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They need it - they're the ones falling down the most.
From Jay Leno
Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.
The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!
You're not famous until my mother has heard of you.
CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.
Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.
If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
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