I can't be as flip as I once was.
From Jimmy Kimmel
The truth is, we have this idea that late night is about creativity and being cool, but that's not our job. Our job is to get as many people watching the commercials in between our show. That's the reality of it.
On Letterman and Leno, it always bothers me when they go outside the studio and it's daytime.
The Republican National Convention is a great place to hear people talk about politics and values and all that sort of thing. But there's one thing brings me back year after year, and that's white people dancing. The RNC is the world's premier Caucasian amateur dance festival.
I'm a creative consultant, whatever that means.
No matter who it is, I hate to see people losing their jobs. I really do.
It's funny how all of this has worked out - I wasn't popular in high school, but now every drunken guy in the United States wants to be my pal. They all want to buy me a shot, and pretty soon I'm throwing up.
There's an air of mystery around the Masons, but the reality is that they're mostly a bunch of veterans getting drunk in a lodge that they've built to look like a temple. It's just a bunch of guys trying to get away from their wives.
If I have one criticism of the other late-night shows, it's that they're almost entirely scripted.
My definition of cursing is probably different from what other people's definitions are.
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