One of the first things I bought when I made 'Roseanne Show' money was a farm in Iowa.
From Roseanne Barr
I do say that I am in favor of the return of the guillotine and that is for the worst of the worst of the guilty.
Both the Democratic and Republican parties are bought and paid for by corporate America and cater to the needs of the highest bidder as opposed to the people they claim to represent. I cannot be bought.
The real truth is, I just want to keep the voice of dissent alive in all of our elections. I don't really want to hang out with politicians.
I think that all comics or humorists, or whatever we are, ask questions. That's what we're supposed to do. But I not only ask the questions, I offer solutions.
When I used to watch comedians with my dad, he laid it all out for me. He wanted to be a comedian himself, and he was so funny. We'd watch stand-up on TV, and he'd tell me the subtext of what they were saying.
You can't break through Hollywood formulaic points of view. I've tried, and I think I was more successful than anybody at doing it.
I'm not a politician. I think that uniquely qualifies me to become president of the U.S.
There is no real third party in America. There's this one party that has two sides to it - the Democratic and Republican side. It's one party that has two heads.
In order to be able to write a good joke, you have to find the truth.
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