I loved comedy all my life. I think it's a real powerful art form.
From Roseanne Barr
The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner.
I try to do women's-point-of-view comedy. The joke is, 'This is what I think; there's the truth.' I try to think of stuff that's real broad, but the more personal it is, the more universal it is. All my friends go through the same stuff.
I think I'm hysterical. I watch myself on tape and just roar - isn't that weird?
I'm tired of watching as men destroy all the world. Everything used to be beautiful when women were in charge, and now I, working as the physical manifestation of the goddess Isis and the reincarnation of Cleopatra, have decided to save the world.
I want to eat, cook, meet famous people and make fun of them.
They've said 'Roseanne's nuts' for years, and now I'm going to make that a reality - I'm all about nuts now, macadamia nuts!
I am an observant Jew! Now my secret is out.
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