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Where did you run today? Now there's a question you don't often hear.

I am a distance runner, a marathoner... literally and figuratively.

I was so wild and crazy and dumb in my car. It didn't run but 30 miles an hour. You made do.

Those days if you drove cross country and you broke down on the side of the road, and the sign says 200 miles to the next gas station, you knew you were so screwed.

I would have to commit a crime and have cops chase me. That would be the only way to get me to jog five miles.

One time, a girl dropped her phone in my pocket and I found it and was like, 'There you go.' And she said, 'If you'd had my phone, you'd have had to meet up with me to give it back.'

You don't just one day say, 'That's it, I'm doing this, I'm going to throw all my shoes out and I'm not eating honey and I won't drive my car because there are animal bones in the tires...' because you'd drive yourself around the bend.