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Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.

I've realized you can use a fork as a spoon if you use it rapidly enough.

Kids today and for the last 20 years have held the fork and knife in unbelievable ways. They hold the fork with a fist and the knife like a saw and they shovel it in. It doesn't matter to them which way they hold their knife and fork. They eat every which way. I'm amazed they get food into their mouths at all.

I was raised in a tribal situation, among cannibal people.

You don't need a silver fork to eat good food.

Nothing is less important than which fork you use. Etiquette is the science of living. It embraces everything. It is ethics. It is honor.

I believe that if ever I had to practice cannibalism, I might manage if there were enough tarragon around.

Cannibals prefer those who have no spines.

There is no cannibalism in the British navy, absolutely none, and when I say none, I mean there is a certain amount.