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Negotiating in the classic diplomatic sense assumes parties more anxious to agree than to disagree.

The whole concept of negotiating is intimidating to many people.

Oftentimes, the best negotiations result in a deal that benefits both parties. There are times when you simply want to go for the jugular, but often, you want the other person to feel pleased with the outcome, even if you are the clear victor.

I do believe that in order to be a successful negotiator that as a diplomat, you have to be able to put yourself into the other person's shoes. Unless you can understand what is motivating them, you are never going to be able to figure out how to solve a particular problem.

When people are uncomfortable - and many people are when they have to negotiate - they start rambling as a way to fill the vacuum of silence. Some of the strongest negotiators I know just sit back and listen. The less they engage, the more likely the other person is to slip up and offer information they otherwise would have kept guarded.

Negotiation is not a policy. It's a technique. It's something you use when it's to your advantage, and something that you don't use when it's not to your advantage.

I'd like to add that negotiating is not something to be avoided or feared - it's an everyday part of life.

I think each negotiation should be based on what's the best decision - taking everything into account, not taking one thing into account.