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Kids are messy!

When I was growing up, hand washing was a ritual, but now it's a necessity. A child dies every 15 seconds from preventable causes, which has got to stop.

The thing with children is they're a bit like baking a fruitcake: you throw all the ingredients in but you never know how they're going to turn out.

I'm really terrible with small children; they're small, noisy, irritating, damp and soggy.

I think children are like pancakes. You sort of ruin the first one, and you get better at it the second time around.

But unfortunately, when you have a kid, you sometimes eat everything they leave behind. So far today I've had some of her leftover pancakes with peanut butter.

Kids are very cruel to each other.

Commercials that are geared towards kids. I think they should just, like, wipe them out.

Cleanliness is very important. If you let kids make a total mess in the kitchen and then leave, you're not really teaching them anything.