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Alcohol is the cause of all my problems.

I don't drink as much as I use to could.

You have problems, you think drink helps, then you have two problems.

I've stopped drinking, but only while I'm asleep.

When I stopped drinking, it was only because I thought if I don't stop, I'm going to die.

I never drink while I'm working, but after a few glasses I get ideas that would never have occurred to me dead sober.

You know I love pot, and I love beer, but I am totally sober, just because it completely stopped working for me.

The worse you are at thinking, the better you are at drinking.

I can't even sleep in. My body won't let me.