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If I have to, I'll go and direct theater and talk till the cows come home.

There's nothing like sitting back and talking to your cows.

No longer diverted by other emotions, I work the way a cow grazes.

I have three cows, and I'm looking forward to more in the future, so I'll have a little herd.

Cows are my passion. What I have ever sighed for has been to retreat to a Swiss farm, and live entirely surrounded by cows - and china.

You can do gross-out until the cows come home but if there isn't something to balance it, then it's not going to work at all.

You can only milk a cow so long, then you're left holding the pail.

If a cow walked into this room, I'd probably walk out. I could milk it, but my dad never forced me to do a lot of chores like that, mostly because he loved doing it himself.

My dad hates doing PR, so I volunteered to do this for him.

I don't know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there's a little confusion between humor and gross passing for humor. That's kind of regrettable.