Author

Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.

From Joan Rivers

I love the Internet, and I love that you can say whatever you want.

From Joan Rivers

My audiences get younger all the time.

From Joan Rivers

I think I was the third person in the world to get a Kindle, and I hated it from the minute I got it.

From Joan Rivers

Fat jokes aren't relevant, but they're hilarious when you find them.

From Joan Rivers

It's like, God, I'm in my 80s. Nobody, when I die, is going to say, 'How young?' They're going to say she had a great ride.

From Joan Rivers

Prince Charles is so funny. So, so funny.

From Joan Rivers

I had a friend who was a plastic surgeon, so he would do little things. I never had, like, a full thing. So I would go in maybe once every two or three years, and he'd do a little here, a little there; tweak you, like you tweak your car. Then I became the plastic surgery poster girl.

From Joan Rivers

I've never thought of it consciously... I say exactly what I think, and very often it's totally politically incorrect. I get, always, chastised for it. So it's not shtick. But I think I'm the one who says, 'The emperor has no clothes.'

From Joan Rivers

Show business is - you're there by somebody's fluke. And as long as somebody likes you, and the show is going well, you're fine. I'd do anything. There's so much I want to do.

From Joan Rivers

Joan Rivers

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