Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.
From Dave Barry
It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent.
If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.
What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.
Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.
Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.
Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.
The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.
'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.
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