When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?
From Steven Wright
I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.
How young can you die of old age?
If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?
If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?
I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
If God dropped acid, would he see people?
It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
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